Offer of Services
I live on Indian River and can certainly appreciate the need for the subway. I had a few thoughts to share with you. First, I can offer you the services of my cleaning company. I promise it won't cost you one cent. In fact, we work so quietly, it's as if we were NEVER THERE. I also can see an opportunity to earn money by providing services. My construction company can install an underground, heated swimming pool, again with no maintenance costs at all. I also own kiosks where I sell headlight fluid, muffler bearings, and other auto accessories. I'm sure that riders on the subway would be interested. And my final idea is to sell left-handed smoke sifters for those riders that wish to smoke on the train.
I hope some or all of these suggestions will add to the almost perfect experience that I'm sure you wish your riders to enjoy. They should have such a smooth ride that they don't even BELIEVE THAT THEY ARE IN A SUBWAY CAR. After living near NYC for 55 years, I'd like to see the same quality here on Merritt Island.
Michael A. Neuhaus
[Tuesday, May 09, 2006]
You have that great pioneer spirit of thrift and efficiency. Your NYC experience will certainly prepare you for our demanding riders. Ed
Saving Energy and Noise Control
“With the high cost of energy, the Authority must do everything possible in order to control operating expenses. The use of “co-generation” facilities should, therefore, be given the highest priority. Fortunately, the availability of idling cruise ships near the Port Canaveral Station should allow the system to tap into a cheap source of energy with very little additional investment. By plugging into the ships generators, the excess power they produce could be used to run the subway. The only operating cost would be a part-time employee standing by to unplug the cord when the ships leave. Of course, the passengers should be warned that they may lose power during the transition. Perhaps fares could be reduced during this period to compensate for the interruption in service.
We would also like to complement the Authority on the high quality of the noise control system. Having lived on South Atlantic Ave this winter, we have noted the traffic noise, but never heard the subway. Keep up the good work! “
Satisfied Snowbird
Great thinking, and thanks for the compliment regarding noise suppression.
Perhaps some big backup batteries would eliminate the moments of darkness on the subway when the power transfers from FPL to the cruise ships.
We have have reduced or eliminated the noise problem by using patented "Synco Super-Lube" rail lubrication products. These products are applied to the rails with standard wayside lubricators.
Because of the high lubricating properties of the "Super-Lube" product, and its adhesive and tracking ability, very efficient lubricating and noise suppression effects can be achieved. It is based on a Tetrafluoroethylene polymer, the most slippery material known to science. It contains no silicone or petroleum distillates. It is non-toxic, biodegradable and non-polluting. The temperature operating range is -45oF to +500oF. "Super-Lube" is waterproof and will not wash off. Visit here for more information.
Sharing a Wealth of Ideas
Dear Sir:
I have read with great interest your Merritt Island Subway campaign and I believe I have a project that would fit very well into your format. As you plan to have stations at various locations, I recall my days in ancient New York City where shoe shine booths permitted travelers to get their shines on the way to work.
My project, while not dealing in shoes, is centered around the fads of today. I propose to develop a circulating “Underarm Merkin Nolas” (That’s Salon spelled) backwards so as not to interfere with any copyrights.
This will be the forefront of the latest beauty fad where a client can get a quick Underarm Merkin Cut to impress her coworkers, or others. The installation will consist of a portable screen and high stool (just like the old shoe shine chairs). where I, as developer and artist will use a variety of pocket sized tools to sclupt designs in the underarm hair.
The client will be able to chose from a variety of designs such as diamonds, circles, squares, rectangles, etc. as well as sculptured art featuring the faces of prominent movie stars and other celebrities.
The portability feature will permit me to go from station to station which will make it appear there are nolas at every station.
Just think of the possibities! I could set up in the back of an unused (or second hand if necessary) SUV, at Buddy Vickers then move to the back room of Bill Harding’s store.
As an introductory offer, I am offering this program to you exclusively for only $1,000,000. I will supply all the maintenance and tools and hope to see this spread throughout the country!
Albert Humphernagel, Resident Genius
No one can argue that our residents don’t have vivid imaginations! And the check is in the mail!, Ed.
Our Educational System at Work
I teach classes to Middle School students on Web site Evaluation. Your web site is a perfect example to use for this class. I need to be able to tell them the real intention of this web site when I am finished with the class. May I dare ask, what is the purpose behind this site? Fun? Advertisement? Promotion?
Our purpose -- of course -- is to build ridership systemwide and to promote the value of public transportation in these days of $3.00 per gallon fuel. It’s all tongue-in-cheek, but with great entertainment value as we deal with those lacking a sense of humor. BTW, This is too much work to be fun. Ed ..
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